It's been a while since I wrote a rambling post and today I feel the need to bash the keyboard and try to make sense of my very jumbled brain. Over the last couple of years, this blog has been pretty much all business, with very few personal posts - I seem to save that for Instagram. When I started this blog, I was a young 20-something who was about to give birth to their first child and writing became a cathartic way of keeping my racing thoughts at bay. Right now I'm longing for that, the need to unscramble these thoughts in a pretty unedited way. I may not even share this post, if I do, I'm clearly feeling brave. It's funny how before I would hesitate to hit publish, but these days it feels uncomfortable. I'm unsure what's changed.
I recently wrote on an Instagram story that life feels like wading through mud at the moment. Home, work and just generally getting out and about seems difficult - Norfolk appears to be completing all roadworks at once. Everything seems like it is not without its challenges. Constantly getting ill and having to have time off work for yourself or to care for loved ones. Pay not keeping up with inflation. A volatile housing market (more on that later). Endless things to remember from school - which child is supposed to be where on which day, have you remembered they are swimming at school?
Why is there always so much to remember? So much change with so little progress - and I'm not just talking about No.10.
Maybe this is post covid life now, it's all coming to catch up with us. The ever-gloomy news reports. The constant price rises on every corner. Life just seems to have halted and trying to progress feels hard right now.
We decided that this year we would buy our dream forever home and we could not believe our luck when our offer was accepted on that very home back in August. We have unfortunately made very little progress due to two of our buyers pulling out. I knew this would be the worst time to try and buy & sell but I was not prepared for the emotional heartbreak this process is causing. We are so fortunate that our vendors are still happy to continue to sell with us but the longer this takes more it feels like the dream is slowly disappearing. I won't go into much detail but my goodness it is all so nerve-wracking and very consuming right now. It's perhaps one of the main reasons I'm feeling so stuck.
I know I'm not alone in feeling so flat about life right now and so many are struggling too.
I'm trying to go back to focusing on what I know makes me happy. Meditation, reading, cosy evenings and walks will all be in order. Along with blogging, I have really missed writing a good rambly post so I think more of these will be thrown in alongside the usual content. I need to trust that these things will sort themselves out and I can't control the uncontrollable (which I hard for me... another blog post for sure!).
I would love to hear how you are feeling currently, are you feeling weighed down with life? Are you actively trying to do anything to change that? I would love to hear how others get out of their funks because I hate feeling like this!
K Elizabeth xoxox
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