How to Gain Balance in Your Life

Do you ever feel like you're spinning too many plates? You put the children to bed and you feel somewhat defeated, there's still so much to do but not enough hours in the day? This is how I have felt, on and off since becoming a parent and I have come to realise it is all about balance. We have so many things that we have to balance in our lives, family, work, leisure, household chores, caring for others, children's commitments, caring for ourselves and the list goes on. “Finding balance” in our lives is so important, yet so hard, that there are mountains of books and articles about it. So what's the magic solution?

Prioritise

Often, trying to achieve a sense of balance results in us creating goals that we must complete. These goals, deciding which are most important, and then, doing the most important things first. The problem is often figuring out just what is most important. On any given day, in any given moment, what is your priority? Is checking your email more important than playing with your child? Is taking a hot shower more important than talking to your best friend for the third time today? In order to stay on course, you may have to re-examine your priorities regularly. But the point is that once you decide what’s important, focus on it and get it done. 

Make a List

First thing in the morning, write down everything that needs to get done that day. Once you have everything down, separate the items into urgent vs. non-urgent to determine the top priorities for that day. Anything that is left over you can add to your future schedules in the coming days/weeks depending on it's urgency.

Assess the Value

 Completing certain tasks will offer more benefit than others. For example, my "day job" workload will always be more of a priority than my blog work due to the nature of it.

Be Honest

When creating your list of priorities, be realistic about your bandwidth. Setting unattainable goals will only cause disappointment down the road.

Be Flexible

To be able to effectively prioritise, you must be able to deal with changing priorities. Take them as they come and decide if they are urgent or not. Sometimes it's hard to do this as everything can feel overwhelming, but the more you force yourself to do this the easier it becomes.  

Set Short Term & Long Term Goals

Whilst you may think this is linked to prioritising, it is often helpful to set yourself both long and short-term goals. A combination of short-term goals that will help you get you to your longterm goal. For example, if you want to completely minimalise your home, your short-term goals might be to get started by minimalising your wardrobe, or the "odds" draw. This can then also help you prioritise too.

Schedule

If you're anything like me then you need to some kind of structure to your days and weeks, but you also need to be okay with the unexpected and stepping outside of your comfort zone. That way, you can keep life exciting while still getting stuff done. But, how the heck do you actually do that.

In the past, I’ve tried to schedule my tasks at a specific time on a calendar that I keep on my phone, but in all honesty, I always found myself falling behind and getting thrown off if something got in the way. A better idea is to block out your time into chunks, say an hour or two hours, for example

9:30-10:30 – Writing blog posts
10:30-11 – Take a break, have a cuppa and read a magazine
11-12 – Tackle laundry

Whilst you're busy scheduling tasks, also block in free time. Give it a specific time, but don’t plan out any particular activity – see what you feel like when the time comes. It’s so important to get out of your regular habits and try something exciting. And always, schedule in self-care. This is a non-negotiable. Whether it's taking a bath, getting your hair done or going for a walk. Make a time and promise yourself you time. You will thank me later for it.

Let Go

Of any of those spinning plates that do not bring joy to your life anymore. If your job doesn't bring fulfilment then find one that does, it's a scary move but if you've got to work then do something you absolutely love. If a friendship is just causing too many headaches, then move on. Not happy in your relationship, move on. Letting go is one of the most empowering skills you can have in your toolbox. It's not about not giving a shit but more about being strong enough to say "actually, this does not make me happy and I'm worth more than this". Only focusing on the things that are important and makes you happy will almost definitely help with the balancing act of life. 

If you would like more posts like this then please keep a look out for my next few posts and worksheets that will help you achieve a more happier fulfilled life.

K Elizabeth xoxox